But Why?

America is advertised as the 'land of opportunity', but all of that image is a farce. From childhood up Americans are taught to believe they can go from the bottom to the top in a snap of the finger. We are never taught to think critically or plan for the future. We live very individual lives although we very much mingle with and impact each other. Logic is a stranger in our land, in which plenty of things don't make sense. Yet at the same time scores of Americans complain about conditions, only few consider a proactive approach to life. I am a proactive person in everything I do. Often if I do something of a rogue nature.. I even plan that too; "Jeena, tonight just go with the flow" lol :-D My biggest goal in life has been to live and love with integrity. American society will not permit me to live this way. Often times to progress, one must lie, cheat and steal. Most wealthy people of previous generations are found to have scandals in their closets... ponzie schemes and the like all tarnishing their reputations. As I observe, I wondered if there is any actual way to obtain the 'American dream' in a legit way. I see the ramifications that living scandalously takes on their families. Either their children are clones of their parents, struggling with addictions, dealing with homosexuality or gender identity issues, stricken with medical issues etc. Simply put.. these are issues I rather not cultivate. For a sensible model in living I looked to the past. I implemented lifestyle models that actually worked and adopted a mentality of the same. But its been a hard pill to swallow.. few share my view, and therefore moving forward in the way I would like has been an abrasive path. Naturally, to achieve my dreams of marriage and family, I can not obtain them on my own. The pool of eligible, sensible gentleman that actually like black women and are not weird or gay is small. I thought I had circumvented it by dating a foreign man that had migrated to the states, but found that he was a sponge for all the American toxins I had tried to avoid. My next trick would be observing a foreign man in his environment. VOILA! Where would I go? How? and Why?
London made the best perfect sense. It had shared the traditional European values of quality of life and family, yet was a land in which I would not have the language barrier. I felt that relocating there would not be as tremendous a culture shock as I would endure moving to a non English speaking country.My first step? I set out to learn what I could about immigration.

The Concept

I had never ever felt as if I belonged in the United States. As a educated, open minded, beautiful,logical young black woman; I continuously looked for my place in society. Fortunate to begin traveling young, I saw life from a different perspective. I distanced myself from the American media because I felt it did not represent me or members of my family. My take on things was always seemingly different from others in my peer group. In college, I had hoped to connect with more like minded people, but most were trendy.. connected to their T.V. and phones, wanting to emulate celebrities without any rhyme or reason. I was always more independent and more enthralled with the success of my personal life over watching others live theirs. I cultivated only a few strong relationships in college, which left me frustrated, after all the universities and colleges are supposed to be churning out the next generation. Where exactly did I fit with them? My love life was always in a perpetual mess. I possess a deep passionate love in which many of those I loved could not understand. The average young American is dealing with plenty of dysfunction in their lives.. may it be family issues, drug problems or emotional issues. We are promoted to address the exterior more than the internal. For those of us that really are who we appear to be, it is difficult to connect and build with those that mask in an facade. Several people I dated left me only to return when they were more mature, trying to rekindle, but I had moved on and was no longer interested. I attributed this to the more liberal lifestyles that are constantly promoted in American culture. The more conservative way is perceived as 'outdated' and more modern ways (often stupid and not tried nor true) are heralded. In the more recent years of my adulthood I have found it absolutely unbearable. Between the lack of quality education,the toxic foods,the deception, the terribly biased media, the violence and unjust treatment of people of color, the lack of community preservation or conservation, blatant religious attacks on Christians, perpetuation of homosexuality, impressionable leaders that conformed to the ideas of those they were supposed to be leading, just to name a few.. I was waking up depressed, spending nearly every day pondering about my future and the future of my future children. I would often cry in despair.. wondering if my voice was just a grain of sand on a beach. I married a foreign man, hoping to avoid certain cultural pitfalls, but was confronted with others. I yet again felt alienated even with the person who was ideally supposed to be my lifelong partner. After a few years of strained marriage he opted for divorce. I was sad but not surprised that he would quit. After all he was completely immersed in American culture, and had developed a mindset to mirror theirs of disposable relationships. I am unusual in the respect that I am very traditional. I believe in order, I believe in courtesy for your neighbor. I believe in considering future generations when making choices today, and regarding marriage; I do not believe in quitting. My American peers are a reckless bunch.. interested in only self. Feeding their burning lusts with no consideration of how this will impact the rest of the world. Over the years, I learned not to procrastinate on my dreams.. and it was during one of these dreams realized (a solo trip to London) that I found an place I was comfortable in. The BBC hosted great quality programming, the streets and subways were kept clean,roads maintained, government abreast and involved in community issues, traditional lifestyle was promoted and significantly less violence. The British actually scoffed at the Americans; pitied them for there absolute foolish behaviors, just as they have over the decades of American decline. Understanding that in order to prepare for the future, hard decisions must be made and executed. After two trips to the U.K, observing the lifestyle in both central London and the English countryside... I was sold on my next move: migrating to the U.K. By the time I returned from my second excursion late in the fall of that year; things in my life had also consequently lined up for the move. My ex requested a divorce, i believe under the impression it would hinder me, but it propelled me forward with violent force. I filed for my British passport in December of that year, and in March of the following year my citizenship to the U.K. was granted. I now had full rights to work and live in the U.K., and absolutely astonishing feat and accomplishment considering recent British immigration laws (I applied through decent through an Bermudian mother). I had determined that if I were to receive it, that I would make the move in hopes for a better life for my children and for myself. I was now faced with the colossal process of piecing together a plan that would get me there, but I was up for the challenge.